| Title | : | Shame Interrupted: How God Lifts the Pain of Worthlessness and Rejection |
| Author | : | |
| Rating | : | |
| ISBN | : | 1935273981 |
| ISBN-10 | : | 9781935273981 |
| Language | : | English |
| Format Type | : | Paperback |
| Number of Pages | : | 337 |
| Publication | : | First published April 22, 2012 |
Shame Interrupted: How God Lifts the Pain of Worthlessness and Rejection Reviews
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Shame can be a pervasively body-mind phenomenon if we allow it to go that far into us. It can cripple us emotionally.
The force of stark and shameful, or just plain embarrassingly painful circumstance can PUSH us into a veritable Slough of Despond.
And the 17th century writer John Bunyan said that many of those among us find it hard to escape from that Slough, and its monstrous child, the Valley of the Shadow of Death, once we’ve sunk into its endless marshy gloom.
So what do we do when the Curse of Humbling Shame pushes down on us?
Push back up, with equivalent force of character!
Welch is right.
We have to break down the Curse that pushes us ever downward, by totally BEARING the brute strength of our oppressive pain - as Jesus did - and in turn harvesting its strength through an attitude of ultimate seriousness.
You see, pain is universal. It’s everywhere.
And it’s what makes us real.
Pleasure softens reality. It’s a drug. But pain IS reality, and if borne properly, can give our life true SUBSTANCE.
It’s like Ancient Greek temple statuary...
We have to push up on that upper cornice with the blunt strength of an immovable object of statuary - and Faith helps us do that.
No, I don’t mean like Beethoven is said to have done, shaking his pained fist in extremis upon his deathbed upwards at the stormy heavens...
No - but by just breaking down our pain into its root in universal pain, we will begin to see that the world’s towering rage will gradually be defused.
Our shame may turn us into broken people, but we in turn can say to all our broken friends, “You know, it seems like we’re finished - but we’re all living in a badly broken world! And we’re ALL just making othe best of a bad situation!”
And all the bad guys are thrown into this leaky lifeboat with the good.
But they totally lack flexibility, because they just deflect their pain into their unwitting victims in temperamental power games.
And left alone, they sink faster.
And you know what Yeats said about coming to the end of your rope in the presence of your tormentors? Listen, for it all comes out in the wash:
An aged man is but a paltry thing,
A tattered coat upon a stick, unless
Soul clap its hands and sing, and louder sing
For every tatter in its mortal dress.
Sink or sing.
Yes - just in praising our Creator - and singing more raucously for every tatter in our mortal dress, that’ll do it!
Because we’re all now in the same boat, and MUST make the Best out of a Totally Bad Situation. Like COVID-19. We’re all sitting ducks.
But THAT is where our Hope lies. For we will never SEE God in this life - but we can stand up and Sing in faith, and Praise Him. The meek will inherit a new heaven and a new earth.
Most of us by now have had it, of course, in this brainy technological age with our lost gods of power.
And their too-easy solutions.
As some politicians take easy refuge in irrationality, so we too turn too to our primitively aggressive roots for release...
Don’t go there.
Surely we don’t want to carry our debt load further! Isn’t this poor life enough? Why listen to that pained little voice inside our heads weighing against our last hope without pause? For, as our better self sings...
Boy, you’re gonna carry that weight
Carry that weight
Such a Long Time....
Look - we’ve only got to break down the word ‘suffer.’ What does it mean once it’s split apart?
Get this!
“SUFFER” is derived from its roots - SOU-FER. Bear UP underneath the pain.
And THAT’s what we have to do to keep on going, on a full head of steam! So first of all, Welch says, we must KNOW our pain’s causes clearly.
Then we have to learn to objectively bear - push up with an equivalent force of a Greek Dyad - into that Low Ceiling of Chronic Anxiety. With all the strength of our Life Force.
It works for me. And it can work for You, Too...
Reasoning our problems out works wonders.
None of us is perfect. We’re all in the same boat.
But we can just KEEP ON TRYING. And singing.
And this book can help us do just that. -
I don’t review many non-fiction books. Not because I don’t like them or because I don’t read them. It is because they take me so much longer to read and ponder my thoughts before I put them on paper.
Shame Interrupted took me an extra amount of time. I found myself reading a portion and then needing to put the book down and spend some time thinking and absorbing what I had just ingested. My copy of the book is so marked up and filled with sticky notes that I’m going to have to buy other copies to pass along. This one isn’t leaving my grasp!
Dr. Welch begins the book at the very beginning. He unveils what shame really is and where it came from. We start the journey with the very first humans in the garden before shame descended. Through the use of conversational narrative we are made to see that we all suffer from it in one form or another because we come from a fallen state.
This book is a journey through scripture and modern day life that explores how we try to cover, overcome and move beyond shame. The truth is that there is no escaping it except the power of Christ’s atonement for us. By the time I reached the final chapter Brides and Banquets I alternately wanted to weep and cheer.
I recommend this to anyone…because we all suffer from shame of some sort. We are ashamed of things we have done. We are ashamed of things that have been done to us. But in the pages of this book lie the answer to overcoming that shame. Pick it up and prepare to let the burden go. -
Great book. It talks about a topic that no one writes about--Shame. There isn't even anything in the theology books about shame, though it is all over the Bible. It also comes up in my counseling all the time and is at the heart of many many problems people have with living.
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Like all Ed Welch books, the content is excellent, but the style falls short. He's very repetitive and a little bit too folksy for my taste. But the flip-side of that complaint is that the book is easily accessible to virtually everyone, as a book this important should be.
Particularly helpful to me was his breakdown of the four types of shame.
Shame of what we've done (before God)
Shame of what we've done (before others)
Shame of what's been done to us (before God)
Shame of what's been done to us (before others)
In true human fashion, the most serious type of shame (the first) is often the one that worries us the least. But when we deal with the shame of what we've done before God, all other shame should melt away. (This is essentially the same argument in his book on people-pleasing -- i.e. the solution to fearing man is to fear God more.)
The goal in dealing with shame is to own your own sin, but *only* your own sin. It's often tricky to sort through which is which. (I'd say it's nigh impossible without an extra pair of eyes. And there's the catch, since shame hates to be seen.) Here's one quote I found particularly insightful about taking shame that isn't yours: "We blame ourselves because in a strange way it helps us feel as if we have more control. If we are responsible for what went wrong, for whatever hurt us, we might be able to figure out how to stop it from happening again." I'd never quite identified the roots of that tendency, but it makes perfect sense. Far from being noble, taking shame that isn't yours is a refusal to trust God.
The only way out of the quagmire of shame is to be reminded over and over, by the Spirit as well as fellow believers, that God has a particular love for the shamed, that Christ himself experienced intense shame, and that Christ's shame has now been transformed into glory and ours will be too. And the last part is the hardest, because it requires the shamed to accept a gift they *know* deep in their bones they don't deserve. But as Welch says, "If you want Jesus, you must be willing to accept the honor that goes along with the relationship."
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Slightly off-topic: Welch points out that the Bible mentions shame 10x more often than it does guilt. (Though shame and guilt are often found together, they are distinct. Guilt disappears when you're forgiven, but shame lingers. Shame, like guilt, may stem from something you've done, but shame ultimately says something about who you are.) With that in mind, I wonder if the way most of us evangelicals explain the gospel (Jesus' death paying a legal penalty for our sin, declaring us righteous before a holy Judge) is missing something. We can believe that Jesus took away the penalty for our sin and still remain trapped in intense shame. Perhaps in addition to the legal declaration of righteousness, we should emphasize that Jesus' death provided us with a new way of belonging, a new community, a new family. Just something I've been thinking about. -
A walk through the Valley of Shame into the Kingdom of Light.
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In “Shame Interrupted,” Ed Welch tackles the challenging topic of shame. The Western church has expended much effort in dissecting the topic of guilt. It’s good to see increasing effort being taken to address the equally important issue of shame.
As a pastor and counselor, my experience is that shame is a more significant issue in people’s daily lives than guilt. It can distort our view of self and our view of God. It can cripple us spiritually and emotionally, and sometimes even physically.
Ed Welch’s “Shame Interrupted” is an extended pastoral theological consideration of the topic. “Look under anger, fear, even guilt, and you will find the root of shame.” He defines shame this way: “Shame is the deep sense that you are unacceptable because of something you did, something done to you, or something associated with you. You feel exposed and humiliated.” Welch goes on to explain, “Once you identify shame, you can find it everywhere.”
Welch explains how far reaching the issue of shame is (it’s everywhere) and then begins with the importance of the Old Testament law in dealing with the topic of shame.
Welch then moves on to Jesus’s ministry and death to consider the significant role of shame. Perhaps my favorite chapter in the book is chapter 14, “When God Touches the Untouchables.” If you don’t read anything else, please read this beautiful chapter. “As it happens, desperation is one of the main ingredients of faith. Faith means you need healing, you can’t do it yourself, and you are confident that Jesus is the hands-on Healer. Hmm. Are you willing to contaminate the King? Are you desperate enough?” Welch continues, “Left to ourselves, we instinctively turn inward rather than put our trust and confidence in Jesus. You know this instinct. We call it self-protection, though it is more accurately called unbelief.”
Welch’s chapter 17, “Shame, Betrayal, and Abandonment” is such an important chapter for anyone who struggles with shame to read. In it, Welch helps us navigate how Jesus took on shame for us at the cross. Welch goes on to explain that Jesus doesn’t just take our shame away, he grants us honor. At the cross, Jesus absorbs us shame and grants us honor.
One final note: Welch has a handful of visuals throughout the book that are very helpful.
Welch’s book is significant and needed. I would encourage anyone who struggles with shame to read Welch as well as Curt Thompson’s “The Soul of Shame.” Welch emphasizes theology where Thompson’s emphasis is a little more on the psychology of shame. Both are important. My only critique is that Welch’s book could have been a little tighter and slimmer. He probably could’ve packed a better punch in 225 as opposed to 325 pages.
Thanks so much for your contribution to the church, Welch. May many others come alongside and speak into this important topic.
For more reviews see thebeehive.live. -
This book is so good. This is my second time reading it, this time for a class. I'm happy to say I appreciated the book more this time. Welch's style has even grown on me after having taken two of his classes. This time, the book helped me recognize that a rather large area of struggle in my life is related to shame and I had not previously made that connection. It is incredibly helpful to identify that as I work & pray for healing in that area.
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Excellent book on how a believer confronts shame. I'm not exactly sure why I picked this book up, because I don't have what I would call a particular problem with feeling shame. But I am glad. Being called to look at our blessed hope and confronted with a need for constant confession and reliance on Christ is a need for all believers. If you ave a problem, past or present, with shame or don't really think it is a problem, I recommend this as a way to strengthen your focus on Christ and what He has done for you.
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I had no idea shame was such a widespread and insidious personal enemy for...almost everybody. Once I read a couple chapters, I realized that it isn’t whether you feel shame. It’s what you feel shame about. Unless you’ve already dealt with it, you’re suffering at least a bit of it. It’s holding you back, clouding your judgment, skewing your perspective, growing bitterness or self-pity, hampering your joy, maybe crippling your life. This book is a great walkthrough of the gospel that sets you free of shame—no matter how big and nightmarish, no matter how petty and long ago. Christ was shamed. He took our shame to the cross. And He killed it there. We are free to follow in His steps as grateful servants and sons. We are free to accept the very opposite of shame: glory, honor, and immortality.
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Welch defines, exposes, and remedies the attitudes and scars of shame running through every person's life. I've never considered 'shame' to be a serious issue for the American church to grapple with. The subject seems to me more relevant for Asian and perhaps European cultures, but not something to notice amongst Americans. I was wrong. Welch's definition and counsel make this book among essential readings for today's Christians.
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An excellent book on the experience of shame and the Christian life. Welch's emphasis is on how the Bible addresses shame of all kinds. A great resource for people who feel shame in their own lives, but also a great resource of pastoral counseling.
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Great book, lots of good quotes and lots to think about. It was just way too slow for the first third, a lot of repeated and obvious sentences. It only ventured into new and interesting territory around 40% of the way through. He has some good insights but his writing style is boring, not in a dry way but in an overly simplistic way.
Still, if you’ve never encountered some of these concepts before, this book could be eye opening for you. It was helpful for me. -
Wow! This book was so good. I always thought if I experienced any shame then surely it meant there was something I needed to repent of. There shouldn’t be any shame in Christ, right?….
I learned through the scriptures on different types of shame and how to go about it. It was so good to understand better a daily struggle for so many including myself!
Definitely recommend. -
My copy is full of highlighting and notes. Such an encouraging book for everyone wrestling with shame, feelings of worthlessness, and rejection.
Highly recommended. -
Shame and guilt controlled much of my life from my teenage years up until my late twenties. Even today, I still struggle some with shame and feelings of guilt. Shame controls many people with feelings of worthlessness, inferiority, rejection, weakness, and failure. It causes people to run away and hide rather than to come out into the Light of Jesus Christ. Understanding how Jesus took our shame and guilt through the Cross and rose again to new life is vital to overcoming feelings of shame and guilt, because only in preaching the right Gospel message to ourselves will one ever overcome feelings of shame and guilt. In his new book Shame Interrupted: How God Lifts The Pain of Worthlessness and Rejection Dr. Ed Welch writes to help his readers to look at Jesus through the lens of shame and see how the marginalized and worthless are His favorites and become His people. God cares for the one struggling with shame, and through Jesus you can be covered, adopted, cleansed and healed.
This book looks at shame in four ways; first, shame uncovered, second, shame before Christ, shame, honor and Jesus, and honor after Jesus. By taking this approach the author very deliberately chooses to walk through what the Bible from Genesis to Revelation teaches about shame in order to help his readers understand not only what Scriptures teaches but also how to apply what the Bible teaches about Jesus to our lives.
Reading this book requires that one put it down after only reading parts of it. The author writes in very accessible style, but the content is heavy and makes you really examine yourself in light of Christ. A good book should make you think, but a great book will not only make you think but also change the way you think. Dr. Welch’s book is a great book that not only will make you think, but also change the way you think about shame from the Bible. While many today feel a crushing sense of not being good enough—worthy of only feeling worthless the rest of their lives and Dr. Ed Welch calls us out of this mindset and into the biblical truth that God created us in His image and likeness by coming on a rescue mission to redeem us and reconcile us to the King Jesus who makes all things new—taking our hearts of stone and making us new creations in Him with new desires and new affections all for His glory.
Shame Interrupted is the kind of book I wish I had read sooner, but I’m glad I've read now as its helped me to understand why I struggle with shame, and why I need to look all the more to Christ. If you're struggling with shame, guilt, feelings of worthless, rejection or anything of the like, I recommend you read this book as it will help you to cling to Christ, abide in Christ and run into the arms of your Savior in Jesus who longs to bring healing to your brokenness through His Cross, burial and resurrection. In addition to this, Shame Interrupted will also help you to grow in confidence in the cleansing, adoption and sanctifying work of the Cross.
Title: Shame Interrupted: How God Lifts the Pain of Worthlessness and Rejection
Author: Edward Welch
Publisher: New Growth Press (2012)
Disclosure of Material Connection: I received this book free from the publisher through the New Growth Press book review bloggers program. I was not required to write a positive review. The opinions I have expressed are my own. I am disclosing this in accordance with the Federal Trade Commission’s 16 CFR, Part 255: “Guides Concerning the Use of Endorsements and Testimonials in Advertising.” -
Feel trapped by your life's circumstances?
Wished you had a perfect white picket fence life?
Truth is that many people don't have those perfect lives and reading the bible, we see that following and having faith in God, isn't about having a perfect life, but instead, we see both in the Old and New Testament, a reminder of how imperfect and broken people we all are, with stories that some of us may never be aware of, and yet, what God shows, is that He doesn't look for perfection and instead shows over and over that no matter what our backstory is, we can be used for His glory and we can move beyond what we feel are anchors in our lives.
Look at the story we all know, Adam and Eve....look at Noah's drunkenness, look at Moses self doubt, the bible is filled with imperfect, people who made bad choices and yet God showed that we are still worthy in His eyes and possible to be used.
Maybe not for greatness that will be celebrated (in a good way), on the front page news, and as much as we live in a society that expects the worse from everybody and holds their past in forever condemnation, God doesn't and in, "Shame Interrupted: How God Lifts the Pain of Worthlessness and Rejection " by Edward T. Welch, the reader is guided to see how they don't have to feel bounded by whatever chains they carry with them through life, but instead can find, hope, redemption and freedom.
As shared by the publisher,"Welch guides readers on a journey through Scripture to discover the one enduring remedy for shame: the blood of Christ. By bringing shame into the light, where it can be addressed by the Bible, Welch helps readers to understand and receive the acceptance of God in Christ and experience the relief that comes with freedom from shame."
"Shame Interrupted: How God Lifts the Pain of Worthlessness and Rejection " does exactly that and this doesn't promise to be a, "read this book and overnight be free" but rather...read this book and take those steps needed,to fully and truly, through Christ, move forward, not backward or chained to the past.
Well written, freeing and compassionate, "Shame Interrupted: How God Lifts the Pain of Worthlessness and Rejection " is a great book for those who struggled with feelings of shame and worthlessness. -
One of the great contrasts between pre-fall man and post-fall man is the presence of shame. Before the fall we are told in Genesis that the man and the woman were naked and not ashamed. After the fall they realize they are naked and they try to hide themselves. The curse of sin is experienced in our relationships in the form of shame that seeks to hide from God and others and seeks to protect itself from all invaders. We can’t let people know us. If they know us they will not like us and will reject us. Welch does an excellent job in showing us how shame is experienced in our lives and how to deal with it. Dealing with the implications and applications of situations of uncleanness in Leviticus, Welch interprets these in terms of how we experience the shame that comes with the curse of sin and how God has provided a way to deal with the shame in our lives. I am particularly fond of the fact that Welch doesn’t leave this problem that results from social interaction to be dealt with by the individual in insolation. Healing comes, not by avoiding relationships but through relationships, particularly relationships within the church. We need others to help us to work through the shame. More particularly we need the church. God speaks his healing words to us through the word taught, baptism, and the Supper. While Welch recognizes the complexities that come with the problem of shame, he offers the simple (though not easy) biblical solution: we must learn to live by how God defines us and not by how we want to define ourselves or how others have defined us through words or deeds.
As with all books, there are quibbles here and there, but they are not worth mentioning. Overall, I highly recommend this book for all Christians who are dealing with the problem of shame in their own lives or in the lives of those with whom they are in relationship. I can also recommend it for those who are non-Christians because Welch explains how the gospel is the answer to the issue of the shame that each of us carries. -
The Gospel told in light of shame. Welch writes about the differences between shame before others and shame before God, and reveals who God is in how He treats those who were shamed throughout the Bible. He shows the gravity of what Christ did on the cross for us in taking on our shame, and how shame from others has no more hold on us because of that event - the event on which the whole of history turns. Then he goes on to explain how we can live boldly for God and even willingly taking on shame from the world because of God, and how that shame no longer controls or binds us.
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A few days ago, I expressed my consternation at people who capriciously assign five star ratings to mediocre books. Upon finishing Shame Interrupted by Ed Welch, I initially felt a little ashamed at wanting to assign it a five, but I really think everyone should read this book. Welch tackles the issue of shame, which is pervasive in the world and in the church. Welch walks the reader through the origins of shame and a gospel response. I cannot recommend this book highly enough.
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Welch does what he does best. He zeroes in on the root of the problem, shows us the far-reaching effects of sin in our lives, and then shows us how the Gospel has the power to break the bonds of sin in our lives. As always, excellent work.
Rating: 4.0 Stars (Very Good). -
Good and useful--especially chapter 26 (for me).
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I have just finished this book which was tedious to get through. I believe everyone who calls himself or herself a Christian ought to read this book as it is so prevalent in our culture today and also because it helps solidify in your mind what identity in Christ really means. There is way too much “meat” in this book for me to take it apart properly and give it a detailed review. I believe this is Welch’s best book, and I sensed some humility in him that I did not pick up on in other books.
The renowned social worker, Brene Brown, has made studying shame her life’s work and I have read a few of her books on shame. While they are insightful and helpful, I don’t believe you can have a discussion on shame apart from Jesus Christ. Without Jesus in the picture, it is just social commentary and learning how to think about yourself differently and how to act in front of others.
Welch’s book, on the other hand, points to Scripture and to God as the sources of our faith. He points to the shame of the cross and teaches us that to identify with that shame is how Christ turns it into glory and honor. When we reach out to Jesus and say, “Help” and “Thank you,” we are admitting that we are weak and that He is strong. We are saying that we have nothing and we bring nothing to the table. We are asking him to save us and to hold on to us.
Humbling ourselves before Him, He takes our shame away. In this world, we will experience shame through failures, weaknesses, and rejections. But in a spiritual sense, he takes our shame away and gives us an eternal citizenship with him in Heaven. He becomes our strength and our Father. We can rejoice in being invited to the banquet He has prepared for us for eternity. Focusing on the glory that is to come instead of the worldly definitions of glory and honor will turn things upside down for us.
At times, when he stressed that this freedom from shame is for ME, the reader, I would think, “Well, I’m sure it is for others. But, this is not for me.” Why is it so easy for us to hold on to our shame and why are we so unwilling to believe that Christ cleanses us from past, present, and future sins and forgives us and sets us free? Maybe reading through this book a second time would help solidify some of the weightier material that is so hard to comprehend the first time around.
This book is a gospel-driven, Christ-centered book and is one of a few of its kind out there. -
5 Stars.
Shame Interrupted is a must read for anyone and everyone. I have never read a book that has dealt with such an extremely delicate topic with more love and appreciation than Edward T. Welch. This book is overflowing with hope, zero judgement, and the promises that a life of freedom is tangible and within our reach. Welch, however, does not pull his punches when dealing with shame, which is exceedingly important (and something for which I am very grateful). He says that shame is something that needs to be identified and faced, but not on our own.
God the Father, Jesus Christ, the Holy Spirit, and the Scriptures are the center and foundation of this book. Throughout the entirety of the book Welch is constantly going back to the same message, that now in the Kingdom of God we have no condemnation, we belong, and we are not alone. This beautiful little book was something that I didn't know I needed, and I am so thankful to God for giving me the opportunity to read this, and to Edward T. Welch for writing it. And I would encourage everyone who thinks that they don't need it, pick up this book and read it, even if you haven't experienced shame (someday you most likely will) it offers so much more than a solution to a problem you might think you're not facing.
I really cannot say it enough, this book needs to be read again and again by everyone. It really holds a firm grasp and gives an in-depth understanding into shame and those who have it. It was an incredible encouragement and a beautiful and wonderful read, one that was often bringing me to tears. Please pick up this book and read it, especially if you're on the fence about it. It is a truly remarkable, beautiful, and, yes, hard experience, but it's an important experience, one that could change your life.
I am recommending the book to everyone, to all my family and friends, to anyone reading this review, everyone. Read it. Be encouraged. And share it with as many people as you can. -
3.5/5. An overall encouraging read. Particularly thankful for the parts about the topsy-turvy kingdom of God, in which Jesus honours the weak above the strong and the least above the greatest.
The content of the book, although disjointed and doubtful in parts, meets a crucial heart need: to know one is acknowledged and loved by the One whose love matters most and that He is not ashamed to be associated with us, even when we might sometimes be tempted to be ashamed of Him.
The author does a great job at reinforcing the reality that Jesus is the High Priest that sympathises with us, and He, too, experienced shame and rejection, but came out victorious. Also, that the apostle Paul models for us the value of boasting in our weakness and relying upon God’s strength amidst life’s challenges.
Probably wouldn’t read from cover to cover again, but definitely left earmarks in the sections which left the deepest impressions on me, which I’m sure I’ll need to return to. -
I really, really appreciate Ed Welch. Shame is a far more prevalent struggle than most of us realize (that seems to be a theme with Welch--he takes a topic that you think might not be your problem, and shows you how universal a struggle it really is; see When People Are Big and God is Small for one prominent example). And his tone in writing about it hits all the right notes: gentle and empathetic, firm and no-nonsense, an encouraging balm yet strong and challenging.
The book would definitely be more powerful and effective if one discussed, or at least journaled about, the questions at the end of each chapter (which I did not). But I did SO MUCH highlighting. Will probably revisit. -
Do you want to be free of shame forever? Do you want to come face to face with the only One who can take it away? Read this book, and it will not only pour God’s truth into your mind, but also clean out all the lies that have been told to you about who you are. Along the way you cannot help but know the love of a Savior who bestows overwhelming grace and glory and joy.
Shame comes from something you have done or something someone has done to you. This book journeys through stories in the Old and New Testaments. Jesus understands shame and intentionally finds those who are deemed unworthy and unclean by the world. He wants the ones whose lives are a mess, and he bestows his glory on them and makes them beautiful.
This book is powerful. I can’t recommend it enough.
