| Title | : | What About the Kids?: Raising Your Children Before, During, and After Divorce |
| Author | : | |
| Rating | : | |
| ISBN | : | 0786868651 |
| ISBN-10 | : | 9780786868650 |
| Language | : | English |
| Format Type | : | Hardcover |
| Number of Pages | : | 400 |
| Publication | : | First published January 1, 2003 |
This is the definitive work from the renowned child psychologist Judith Wallerstein on a subject that concerns millions of American moms and dads: How can you protect your children during and after divorce?
Divorce is not a single event but a lifelong trajectory of changed circumstances that demand a different kind of parenting than we have ever known. In What About the Kids? Wallerstein draws on thirty years of in-depth interviews with children of divorce and their parents to show how to create a new family with compassion and wisdom. It covers issues that arise at the time of divorce as well as suggestions for talking to your children months and years after the event.
Eminent psychologist Judith S. Wallerstein shares her unique insight and advice in What About the Kids? -- the first comprehensive guide to easing the impact of divorce on your children -- including:
The best and worst ages for children to experience their parents' divorce
Right and wrong ways to explain divorce to your children
Choosing a custody arrangement that's best for your child
How to involve the grandparents -- a major resource?
Getting the children on your side when you form new relationships
The positive effects of divorce on children (believe it or not)
How divorce can actually make you a better parent
Raising children who grow up able to form lasting relationships
What About the Kids?: Raising Your Children Before, During, and After Divorce Reviews
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Helpful
I wish I had read this book before speaking with my kids about our divorce. Should be required reading for any couple considering breaking up. -
Judith Wallerstein has been studying divorce for several decades now and has written a slew of books on the topic; so many, in fact, that her name winds up in almost everything written on the subject. She's done a twenty-five year study on the long-term effects of divorce on children that informs much of her work. I expect to work my way through several of her books.
So far, the book has given very good advice on how to tell the boys; which points to cover, how to help them shape a family story that is positive and as comprehensive as necessary for their ages. She's thorough and kind and helpful.
Her asides here and there about adult children of divorce are really insightful, too; when there's time, I'll probably get some books about that and spend some more time "sitting around thinking about how I feel," as the Thumpers put it.
First things first, though. I've got kids to raise. -
The thing I like about this book is that it divides the chapters according to different age groups; for each age group there is a preferred/recommended way on how to tackle the topic of divorce. Toddlers are not like teenagers; the different needs & challenges of each age is outlined in a simple way for divorcing parents to comprehend. I have recommended this book to friends and family members; they all found it to be helpful!
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The authors discussed the developmental stages of children and how these abilities and limitations impact a child's experience of divorce. It provides recommendations for how to help children in each age group through divorce. Ultimately, it provides parents and professionals with the child's perspective of divorce as a continuing experience and not simply as a one time event. Highly recommend.
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Very practical info - much good legal info - based on author's extensive study of divorced families over 25 years
Recommended by Melanie, therapist at Barkley and Associates -
I only read the section on remarriage so I can't comment on the whole book. Repetitive advice, but good to read none-the-less.
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Made me realize anew that custody is about what is best for the kids, even if it means I won't get to see them as much when they're rebellious teenagers and want more freedom with dad.
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This is an excellent book on divorce and the effects on children.
