Enjoy Guardian Of The Dead Originated By Karen Healey Contained In Copy

I really wanted to like this book, but I was really just confused the whole time, I must say that Ellie, the protagonist, was very believable and really likable, She seemed like a real person, Other than that though, I didn't really understand what was happening in the story, It probably is because I'm an ignorant American and the author and characters are from New Zealand, including the lingo and storytelling style, The characters are all based on Maori legends, which is part of New Zealand Mythology, Not knowing any of the stories or who the Maori are, limited my understanding of the book, Even the "Fae" are not like western civilization's idea's of the Fae, So, with that said, if I understood anything about New Zealand culture I'm hoping I would've enjoyed the book more, But since I didn't get it at all, I almost stopped reading it even, I have to only give it a,/stars. Sorry. If anyone disagrees, and I'm sure they will, sorry, I tried to understand it, but I just didn't get it, There will be serious spoilers here so youve been warned,
Total rubbish. A mishmash of Maori and Greek mythology, Mostly a waste of time, sad to say, Lots of disjointed bits adding up to very little,
The story is about Elllie Eleanor who makes reference far too often that she is too big and clunky and chunky and has no friends except one superattractive boy named Kevin.
It turns out that Kevin chose her for a friend because he has no sexual attraction toward her, He shares with her that hes asexual,
Now Im confused because doesnt being asexual mean that he doesnt find anyone sexually attractive So then wouldnt he be able to hang out with any girl because he isnt attracted to any of them Why the big deal about Kevin being asexual What was the point of this
Why this was a plot point didnt make any sense to me, particularly when his sexual attraction to a supernatural being is what moves the plot along in the first half of the book.
Ellie, at the request of the enigmatic hotboy, Mark, has been asked to keep an eye on Kevin, to keep him away from the otherworldly scarily gorgeous Reka.

Are you still with me
There are mentions to the Eyeslasher murders, a series of murders in which the victims eyes are cut out.

Mark warns Ellie not to be out alone after dark, Woooooooo. Scary. What does he know Ellie and Mark have some kind of odd connection that he cant explain to her whereupon she proceeds to BEAT THE INFORMATION OUT OF HIM.
Shes a black belt in tae kwon do, At this point Ellie isnt a character I can support or feel any connection, She decides she will beat him up, Yes, he has done some questionable things, but physical violence No, Just no.
Let's flip that around for just a moment, Would it be okay if he beat her up to get something he wanted from her Would we think oh, he's a black belt beating up someone who isn't hitting back, carry on Or would it bring on a feeling of outrage
In the midst of the beating, Ellie has the realization that Mark is, in reality, physically unable to say the words to explain things to her.
She then tramples off to the library to research on what he cant tell her, Of course since he cant tell her, how does she have a starting place to research Ellie has a few light bulb moments ending in her discovery that Reka is a Maori fairy or patupaiarehe.
Once she figures it out then Mark can tell her what Reka is up to, Mark is her son by Kevins great uncle who was believed to have disappeared when he, the ujncle, was nineteen, Reka is now after Kevin so she can mate with him to make more of her own kind, It seems that Kevin, a Maori boy, has unknown magic as does Ellie,
Ellie, Mark and another friend, Iris, manage to stop Reka from sexing it up with Kevin, who is oblivious to everything and even though the book has been, up to now, about saving Kevin, he pretty much leaves the story at this point.

Ellis is attracted to Mark and when hes feeling sad, she launches herself at his lips, only to blame him for this later and say he was trying to use her, to make her fall in love with him because its something that would save him.

After the saving of Kevin, Mark tells Ellie about the patupaiarehe, sort of, Then, after a battle with some of them, Marks mother, Reka, shows up and tells them that the patupaiarehe have plans to kill off the North Island which is actually a big fish, causing a huge earthquake that will sink the island, killing everyone which will make the gigantic Guardian of the Dead this is where the title finally makes a bit of sense so overworked and so tired that she will sleep through one of the patupaiarehe climbing into her toothlined vajajay to give them immortality.
The Eyeslasher isnt a serial killer, but all the patupaiarehe not Mark or Reka, though who are killing anyone with magic and stealing that magic by taking their eyes.

Ellie and Mark go off to save the North Island after Reka lends Mark her eyes, calling on all the magical people they can.
There is a war council while they all plan what theyre going to do and, of course, none of it works out as they plan.
Mark is killed and yes, I said Mark is killed, Ellie, with the help of a magic mask that loves her, goes to the Underworld to stop a patupaiarehe form getting into the Guardians huge toothy crotch and Ellie, of course, makes this whole Underworld trip naked.
I have no idea why, but yep, naked, She comes across the spirit of dead Mark who it seems it not naked and tells him to follow her out of the Underworld in an attempt to save him.
She ends up on the rooftop of her parents house naked and Mark is a sea monster, But this makes Ellie happy since Mark is finally bigger than she is and stronger too, Really The boy she loves is a sea monster and this makes her happy How selfinvolved can she possibly be
Ellie has selfimage problems.
In almost every chapter were reminded that she is huge, really, really, incredibly huge, She is envious of all the little pretty girls with nice complexions, Her selfloathing is almost nonstop, but then Mark says something negative about himself prior to becoming a sea monster and this is what she thinks :”Selfhatred was a big turnoff.
” So she cant accept that he has issues, but shes full up of her big self with them, Wow, way to be inconsistent and judgmental,
She cant seem to decide whether shes a badass or not, At different times, she thinks shes capable of taking care of herself and then shell say shes not any kind of fighter, although she had no problem beating on Mark.
Just saying.
The magic mask was never explained, I kept waiting to learn about it, Ellie knows its ancient and extremely powerful because she can feel it and it loves her, It could make everyone love her, What the heck is this thing Who knows
Conveniently missing parents, Ellies parents are off touring the world after her mother recovered from a serious illness, Why What did this have to do with anything Ellie thinks of how much she cares about her mother when Marks father dies or when he talks about his mother, but really, why was this in the book After almost losing her mother and giving up her friends and activities to help out, her parents repay her care and sacrifice by sending her off to a boarding school and taking off for a year.
Who does this After almost dying, the first thing her mother thinks is “I think Ill leave my child whose given up so much for me for a year!!!” Im mad at these people who dont even appear in the story.
Surely something like they are simply having a weekend away would have covered for why their house is empty so Ellie can use it for the war council.

The mythology goes from Maori to Greek to Ellies own personal mythology or thats what I understood, but I could be wrong, The mix of myths made it all a bit confusing,
Also, from the first of the book I wondered what the heck this author has against Christchurch, New Zealand, She describes it as dirty, dingy and smelly, Ive never heard that about it and Im not from Chch, but I found it kind of an insulting attitude, Perhaps this is common for New Zealanders, much like some Americans make fun of New Jersey or Cleveland I don't know,
There was both too much going on in the book and not enough, So much is still unexplained by the books end that I have an odd feeling that this isnt the last of this story, I wont read any more of it,
One last thing: Why does every YA book now try to recreate the Twilight story Here we have:
Ellie Bella unattractive in her eyes new girl at new

school, doesn't fit in
Mark Edward mysterious boy with red hair who is hot, hot, hot
Kevin Jacob big muscular native boy who will only ever be a friend

Note: I know nothing of Maori mythology, belief or customs so if in my ignorance I've said something offensive about those beliefs, I apologize as that was not my intent.
I don't know what is actual belief and what is created by the author, I can't believe this book was nominated for and/or won awards, I really can't. .