Grasp Not Always In The Mood: The New Science Of Men, Sex, And Relationships Originated By Sarah Hunter Murray PDF

with sex. Always initiating and begging for sex against the always lowerdesire female in heterosexual relationships, Impervious to sexual rejection. These myths in addition to others obliterate the best, most healthy sexual relationship between couples in heterosexual relationships, Inaccurate pictures of male sexuality lock men into a gendered prison where authenticity and intimacy surrounding sexuality is blocked, These inaccurate pictures have sadly not been limited to popular mediaMurray developed her doctoral research based on seeing gaps in the academic literature on mens experiences and discussion of their sexuality.
Not only were men not being asked to discuss their sexual desire, most of the research was being done onyear old men, Murray found her niche in interviewing men from all decades of life about their qualitative experience of sexual desire, These interviews have yielded rich information and normalcy for the authentic, nuanced view of male sexuality as compared to the our cultures mythology, After the introductory chapter, Murray devotes each subsequent chapter to realitychecking each myth, Each chapter cites scholarly research, insights, and profiles a real or composite couple Murray saw in therapy that dismantled the enduring myth, The quickest summation would be that men are susceptible to stress and fears in expressing and acting on their sexual desire, They also need to feel loved for who they are as people in order to truly have the best sex, They need to feel desired and arent happy to just be desiring of another, This book opens up the possibility of freedom and integrated human sexuality for men and couples who open this book,

For more reviewed relationship information, please see my website: sitelinkwww, thecouplessyllabus. com Incredible book fromthat challenges harmful assumptions around male sexuality, I suspect it will be my favorite book Ive for, RequiredReading I think this is a really useful book for cis men who feel like they aren't being men quiet right, or women who plan on being in a long term relationship with a CIS man.
The selfhelp sections are, uh, for a limited audience to say the least, but the research was solid and I appreciate the debunking of so many myths around masculinity.
It all feels like "well, duh" when you read it, but I feel like I'm going to bring it up in a lot of conversations from now on.
Read this along with Emily Nagoski's Come As You Are, Not Always in the Mood by Sarah Hunter Murray is a free NetGalley ebook that I read in midJanuary,

Right away, the author corrects and slows their roll by saying that their book is not meant to be exclusionary on gender, despite referring only to the cisheterosexual male.


In reviewingdifferent myths, there's very little mens sexual research to draw from, though it reaches up into the lofty arenas of empirical studies and qualitative interviews and brings it down to our level with easy to understand wording and pop culture references that discuss why a myth is problematic, a man and a womans perspective, and a case study relevant to the myth like measuring up to others, selfquestioning, sexual urge and desirability, mutual/solo enjoyment, turnons, initiation, saying no, and masculine stereotypes.
If there is one thing we know about men and sex it is that men are always in the mood, Any time, any place. Right

Wrong.

Men's sexual desire has long been depicted as high, simple, and unwavering, But the new research around men's desire tells us this is far from true and that good sex and relationships are suffering from these longheld misconceptions.
In Not Always in the Mood: The New Science on Men, Sex, and Relationships sex researcher and relationship therapist Sarah Hunter Murray presents a lively, timely, and critical exploration of the newest, most surprising science on men and sex, shattering myths about men's sexuality and helping today's couples connect more deeply and authentically than ever before.


Onebyone, Murray examines the most detrimental, deepheld beliefs we as a society promote around men and their desire, and dive into how they affect our intimate relationships daily and what to do about it.
Do men actually crave and enjoy sex more than women Do men "do the wanting" and prefer the chase Where do they stand on sexual rejection What's the deal with porn Answering these questions and more, this is a book for modern women and men alike.
Moving beyond typical "here's what he likes" sexual tips, the book empowers readers and offers a completely new perspective on sexuality that will validate men's experiences and help their partners to a greater understanding of the psychology and emotions surrounding them.
.