Find This Is Kind Of An Epic Love Story Imagined By Kacen Callender Available As Publication

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this is kind of an epic love story, . . that's what makes it epic, You don't need to die for each other to make this exciting, Just the fact that you're here together that's enough, That's epic enough. After reading Callender's latest work, sitelinkFelix Ever After, I decided they should be aclick author.
The ringer that I was put through reading Felix's epic love story is one I will gladly sign up for again.
Because while there is young adult angst, there is payoff, surprise, closure, And that's all I want in my romance books,

This book didn't turn me into a wrung out marshmallow like Felix's story did but I related with Nathan rather viscerally.
He is a neurotic, antisocial writer, . . well, screenwriter . he wants to be a screenwright, He did have an overbearing best friend/ex the kind of drama I'd rather die than endure, and other friends that were picked straight out of a typical American high school movie.
But these little annoyances didn't matter, Because the best things about this book are Nate's wariness of happy endings
Happy endings aren't real.
American Beauty. The Departed. Melancholia. Memento. They've got it right

his love for movies I choose The Matrix third favorite movie of all time
.
. . the film club moderator gives us Pan's Labyrinth to watch with its English subtitles my tenth favorite movie of all time
.
. . "You wouldn't stop talking about Eternal Sunshine of The Spotless Mind for months, "
"Eighth favorite movie of all time"

and Oliver James,

Ah Oliver James, another most precious cinnamon roll, I just wanted to smush him in heart emojis and ugh Nate describes him best,

He's got brown hair tumbling into his face, brown eyes that shine with the kindness of a thousand nuns, the kind of dimples that'd make even a coldhearted soul want to pinch his cheeks.

This is kind of an epic love story, But I did have a few issues with it, The ending is rather abrupt, And not in an ambiguous literary way, But more of an "Is that it" moment because I could have used a few more details, Florence, the ever present bff, needed to learn about this thing called boundaries and frankly I found her pushiness very offputting.


This book has been compared to sitelinkSimon v The Homo Sapiens Agenda but I wouldn't go that far.
It's quite the cavity inducer but it's lacking a certain je ne sais quoi,

If you are in the mood for a lovely low stakes young adult contemporary romance with

great lgbtq representation with a socially awkward film nerd protagonist, look no further.
I'm sad. I'm really sad that I hated this book as much as I did, Maybe hate is a strong word, but while I was reading I felt sad, frustrated, annoyed and all kinds of other negative emotions.


To start of, I was really excited about this book, I thought this was going to be a cute love story with some drama elements, A “romcom” like some critics had called it, But can someone tell me, in what world would you call this a romcom In my eyes this is just a frustrating drama with an asshole MC.
I actually think the description of this book is horribly misleading I was expecting a book with a main character who just refused to get together with his love interest, because he doesn't believe in happy endings, but as it turned out, that plotpoint turns up WAY later in the book.
I maybe would have pushed in the foreground that his love interest/childhood friend is in a committed relationship when he gets back, how about that

When I started reading this, I was really hooked, actually! Sure, I didn't like the whole clichee of “I dated my best friend and still have feelings for her” plotline, but I could get over that.
I actually liked that the book started on such a somber note, with Nate just being through a breakup and Oliver coming back just to state that he has a boyfriend.
I was excited to see that this wasn't a story full of sunshine and happiness, But then things started to turn, Even though Flo had broken up with Nate and had a girlfriend now, Nate kept wondering and asking her “Why not me Why did we have to break up”, clearly still hung up on her, which okay, fair, I'll give him that.
It's a bad situation to be in and he has a right be angry, But then his childhood friend moves back and Nate discovers he still has feeling for him, but o no, he has a boyfriend now.
Which also, fair, situations like that can happen and they SUCK, I understand,

But then this book was starting to piss me off, You know, because you're supposedly reading a gay romance, that Nate and Ollie are probably going to get together, so it becomes this tale of “When is Ollie gonna break up with his boyfriend” Flo even tells Nate that he should go for it, tell Ollie how he's feeling, which in my opinion is a shitty thing to do if you know someone has a boyfriend And aside from mentioning that he has some problems with the longdistance thing, Ollie hasn't mentioned at that point that he wanted to break up with Aiden in any way.
And Nate even SAW how much these two love each other when they video chatted,

Also, can we take a moment to talk about how weird all the characters were about relationships and cheating So Florence cheated, which was a shitty thing to do and she admitted it, okay.
Then Ashley wants something from Oliver, not caring that he has a boyfriend Please tell me I'm not the only one who thought this was weird All while she probably realized in the back of her head that she had a crush on Gideon.
Then came this absolutely ridiculous thing of Flo being like “Nate, you need to date someone, uuuh, let's see.
. oh, right, just go out with Ashley!” what I felt like Ashley had an attitude like “As long as I don't hate you and you're pretty cute, we could totally go out or we could have sex” I just have no words for this, I thought this was absolutely weird and off putting.
This whole book was just about who is gonna end up with who in a relationship, the circumstances don't matter.
Ashley and Gideon get together at the end and why Because they realized they kinda like each other Although I gotta admit, their thing was still the cutest because of their common grounds of videogames, but other than that Nothing.


Okay, so back on track, Nate and Ollie get together and at first a was kinda cute Ollie had literally just broken up with Aiden this morning, too and wohoo, our MCs are finally together.
And I was feeling nothing. Nate kept saying that he had a thing for Oliver, but why Show me some qualities or quirks that you like about him, or even just show me some scenes to show me how happy you are now that you're apparently dating the love of your life The characters in this book were so incredibly flat, they felt like cardboard cutouts in a stage play.


So our MCs are together and everything's not as perfect as it could be, which is normal and yes, I like to read about that, but where did all the problems come from From Nate being an asshole, writing their relationship off pretty much before it even began.
I've never seen an MC with such a pessimistic point of view He kept saying that one of them was just going to get hurt, that they were going to break up eventually and there was apparently nothing he could do, that's just how things were.
Wow. In the last third of this book, Nate's sister and Florence actually seemed to voice exactly my concerns and Nate was just brushing them off until he finally realized, at the VERY end of the book, what an asshole he had been.


Apparently, because of the death of his father, Nate had a very specific outlook on life and relationships.
He kept saying oh, how is he supposed to date Oliver when one of them will die one day and the other one is going to get hurt.
Which has to be the most pessimistic and stupid outlook on life I have ever read, I'm sorry.
I don't have any life experience like this, but I just had a hard time believing that someone could actually have such a pessimistic outlook on relationships, especially if they kept whining about how they were in love with their best friend and later on how in love he was with Oliver.
Like, on the one hand he wanted a relationship so bad for the first half of the book and now he thinks it's all meaningless anyway

I've never hated an MC as much as I hated Nate, honestly.
I'm not saying characters can't be flawed, but if they are the MAIN character and I'm just cheering for them not to get back together with their love interest at the end of the book, there's gotta be something wrong.
Like I said before, Nate was an asshole and I have no idea how he still has friends with how he's behaving.
He kept saying hurtful things to other characters throughout the whole book, while fully realizing that he was hurting them.
The shit he said to his mom What a fucking horrible person, I'm sorry, And he apparently he didn't talk to her for several days/weeks And I know, mom's are probably more forgiving than friends, but how can you be okay with a simple “I'm sorry, mom.
” I just don't understand. When Nate put his “acceptance latter” down, just because he hadn't won the big price and pretty much already gave up on summer classes How he kept asking if he should rather break up with Oliver before one of them got hurt He he flipped at Oliver for telling Ashley about their “sex problems” even though HE had told FLORENCE just a few pages earlier What is wrong with this character Nate kept saying things that make me put my book down and there were a couple times where I thought about not finishing the book and just throwing it in the bathtub.
But I hate judging things that I haven't read through to the end, so I made it through.


I know people are probably gonna argue that the book was about the fact that not everyone has a perfect happy ending, like the book was doing itself at the end.
Honestly, I didn't want Nate and Oliver to get back together at the end, The shit Nate said to Oliver and how he was a selfish little brat pretty much the whole time they were dating made me root for Oliver to just get out of this relationship, get back with Aiden or whatever, or just be single! Anyone's ever thought about that Either way I think he would have been better off without Nate in his life.


Reading this was not a fun experience and I really had to force myself through the lastpages.
A book that makes me hate every decision the main character makes and despise him towards the end, unintentionally, is just not a good book in my eyes and although I really don't like trashing other people's work, I can not at all recommend this book and would advise you not to read it.
Or if you really want to, despite all the points I have brought up, read it and build your own opinion.
And hey, if you have a totally different opinion and LOVED this book, I'm glad! I'm glad you could find enjoyment in something I just can't wrap my head around.
.